The story of the two wolves

 

Have you heard the story of the two wolves? It’s about an old Cherokee who told his grandson about the fight between the black and the white wolf. On the first battle, he told his grandson that the black wolf will win the fight. On the next battle, he told his grandson that the white wolf will win. Out of curiosity, his grandson asked him why he seemed to know who will win the fight. The old man simply answered: “The wolf you feed is the wolf who wins.”

 

This parable seemed to be ancient but it’s actually my first time hearing it. Upon learning the story from our guest speaker Ms. Rosemarie B. Ong, the SEVP and COO of Wilcon Depot, I realized that the story serves as an important reminder of the power we have over our emotions. The white wolf is the one who reminds us of our strengths, accomplishments, and aspirations while the black wolf is our inner critic. The one who tells us that we are a failure and the one who triggers our anxiety and depression.

 

When I heard the story, I realized that I was feeding my black wolf. I realized that for the past few weeks I was criticizing myself and overthinking too much to the point that I’m losing my focus on the important things. My depression and anxiety were apparent in my work as I became lazy that my manager was calling out my tardiness and the unenthusiastic sound of my voice during our meetings. After the session with Ms. Rosemarie B. Ong, I realize that I need to stop feeding my black wolf and start giving attention to my white wolf. I have to use my energy on healthy thoughts, feelings, and emotions.

 

But the question is, how do I feed the white wolf? Most of the time, it’s much easier to feed the black wolf – to complain, to procrastinate, and to give up. It is more difficult to feed the white wolf because it requires discipline, motivation, and determination. It takes effort and courage knowing that it does not produce immediate results.

 

For most of us, it is easier to entertain the black wolf. We complain about our weight instead of eating a healthy diet and working out. We complain that we hate our job instead of quitting and following our passion. We complain that we’re broke when we don’t spend our money wisely. We get depress because of everything we see on social media instead of limiting our screen time. Moreover, the cases of depression have even tripled during the pandemic.

 

There is no shame in admitting that we are struggling mentally. It is normal to feel anxious, worried, and stressed. What is not okay is to constantly entertain our dark thoughts. At the end of the day we need to ask ourselves, will feeding the black wolf do us good?

 

With my answer, I started writing in my journal again and listed down the habits I have to develop in order to drift away from my negative thoughts. They say it takes 21 days to develop a habit, so I set my alarm and slowly complete the below tasks:

1. Practice gratitude – I try to write even the simplest thing I’m grateful for such us waking up to a brand-new day. If we do this every day, it will jumpstart our mood.

2. Meditate and Pray – I honestly didn’t know how this is effective until I tried it. I was looking for ways to clear my mind and a good 20-minute sitting cross legs with my eyes closed made a huge difference. It refreshed my mind compared to the 20-minute scrolling in social media which gives more anxiety. Aside from meditating, leaving my worries to God surprisingly lifts the heaviness in my heart.

3. Exercise – Sweating for at least 30 minutes is known to release endorphins and improve our mood.

4. Write goals – Writing your to-do list and being able to check it will give inspiration to do more.

5. Read motivational books or empowering quotes – Sometimes, we can’t help but surrender to the power of negativity but reading inspirational books can help us shift to a positive mindset.

 

I know feeding the white wolf is a difficult process, but it is rewarding once we give it our full attention that is why developing a habit will make it easier.